Over the past few months, I have written about how money impacts each of our lives in unique ways. Given that money is the lifeblood of the way we manage life, working on our relationship with money, is key to managing it more effectively. As 2025 is upon us, I would like you to begin the new year from a place of knowledge and control when it comes to money. Together, let’s begin to figure out your money matters.
If you are expecting the first step to be figuring out how much money you have, you are in for a surprise. In fact, for this month, lets ignore the actual amount of money and focus instead on your experience of money. Let’s go back to the beginning and ask yourself this: how did you experience life as child in relation to money?
Your answer will be different of course and could range from “we didn’t discuss money, but I knew we had enough”, or “we didn’t discuss money, but I knew we were struggling” to “we had plenty, I never thought about money” and anything in between. The key to finding your answer is in remembering the conversations related to money even indirectly. Those overheard discussions on how one would make ends meet, how often words like “too expensive” or “greedy” or “wasteful” came up. This basic interaction about money, or the idea of it, formed the foundation of how you view money.
Next, let’s think about how you experienced money related activities. For this, you need to recall what happened if you asked for something? Were you even allowed to ask for things? Were you nurtured or were you shamed? This is likely what frames whether you fear money, see it as a necessary evil or simply deny its existence.
Whatever the case in the above scenarios, it is very likely that no one discussed or explained money to you. By this I mean, understanding the dynamics of money. How money is basically a means of exchange, and its value comes from what its being exchanged for. Given this, if you value money more than the other person, agreeing on the price of something can be trickier than expected. Let’s use an example. You fear money, see it as a necessary evil and something to be held on to. If you want to buy a pair of shoes, you expect that the shoes will not be worth just the price of the shoes, but you want to feel like they also are valuable enough for you to part with money which is more precious to you than anything. You may still buy the shoes, but unless it’s they are on sale and feel like they are worth the sacrifice, you will not derive pleasure from the purchase.
Now, think about how complicated this can get if you are not the person earning, and need someone else, with their own relationship with money, to buy you things? This is exactly why, having a bit of money, just for you, no questions asked, helps ease out so much of personal discord. And this, is why the ability to manage your own money – earning/having it, using it, and growing it (so you have more), all without animosity or negativity is the ultimate life skill. Begin 2025 by acknowledging its need and taking steps to learn this skill.
Originally written for Bahrain This Month and published here